Don't buy these.

I'm on a mission to find snacks. I'm getting ready for a big trip and I need gluten free treats for the plane ride. It's been more than once I've had to throw out a perfectly good yogurt at the airport security check as it is technically considered a "liquid." Even Greek yogurt, which is practically a solid.

After reading this heartwarming post on graham crackers, from Gluten-Free Girl & the Chef, I had the little brown beasts on my mind. Never thought you'd miss a graham cracker, did you? We used to eat them at Sunday School, with apple juice. Funny, because:

Graham crackers were originally marketed as "Dr. Graham's Honey Biskets" and were conceived of as a health food as part of the Graham Diet, a regimen to suppress what he considered unhealthy carnal urges, the source of many maladies according to Graham.
[From Wikipedia]

At my Sunday School we learned about our bodies, but then, Dr. Graham wasn't a Unitarian Universalist. Anyway, I'll tell you what will cure you of base desires, sexual or otherwise - these crackers:

To say they taste of cardboard would be a gross misrepresentation. Cardboard, with its chewy consistency and particular, sweet odor, would be a step up from these hateful rectangles. At least cardboard holds together, say, in a helpful storage box. These broke at the slightest touch, which is to say, I would rather eat the yellow packaging than its contents. Ugh.

If anyone needs a "70% organic" dog biscuit for an extremely naughty and ill behaved dog, shoot me an email and these... puppies... are all yours.